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05 Oct

Olivia Ortiz met her first boyfriend when she was an 18-year-old sophomore at the University of Chicago.

She said she set “pretty strong sexual boundaries” with him from the start: He was a 21-year-old senior, but he was also her first kiss, and she told him she didn’t want to go any further than that until she felt comfortable.

He ignored her and pressured her for months, she said, and often tried to take advantage of her when she was drunk or sleeping.

If you find yourself censoring your partner’s behavior when recounting it for friends or family, this might be a sign that some part of you realizes your partner’s behavior is “wrong.” If you find yourself policing your own behavior when with your partner out of fear that they will be “upset” or “disappointed” with you for failing to live up to their (often ill-defined or volatile) expectations, this might help you identify ways in which the power balance in your relationship is unhealthy and skewed. Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance-United States, 2011. The Family Journal: Counseling and Therapy for Couples and Families, 24(1), 52-59. Violence Against Women/National Resource Center on Domestic Violence. Surviving intimate partner violence, or relationship abuse, is hard.It’s especially difficult when you go to the same school as your abuser and have no choice but to eat in the same dining hall, study at the same library, attend the same classes, or participate in the same extracurricular activities.Learn more about the warning signs of abuse and the differences between healthy and unhealthy relationships.Dating violence can cause serious harm to your body and your emotions. Return to top In the United States, teens and young women experience the highest rates of relationship violence.Dating violence is when one person purposely hurts or scares someone they are dating.Dating violence happens to people of all races, cultures, incomes, and education levels.Know that you have the right to be safe, and that your school has a legal obligation under Title IX to ensure that you can safely continue your education.As a survivor of dating violence, you have the same rights as survivors of other forms of gender-based violence on campus; you can learn more about them here.